The winds of change are blowing full force this week, as all of my planned and unplanned changes begin to take motion. My apartment is filled with boxes, mostly crammed full of books (I heart books, big time.) that are all ready to make the move to Johns Island. I have spent the last few weeks purging stuff out of my life that has become dead weight… VHS tapes, clothes, gifts I never wanted, and things that could be better used by someone else. Once again, I find myself going back to a communal setting, living on an extreme budget, and dedicating my time to working outdoors building. My last service year was spent building homes and now I will spend my time building up farms and the community surrounding them. People keep asking me if I am excited and I keep telling them, not quite yet. The whole process is too surreal for me to truly grasp the changes coming my way. There are still so many changes taking place that it is hard to even forecast what life will be like a week from now.
Since my green building job did not accept my proposal to become permanent contractor, I will have to seek out other employment to fill the gaps between the specialty projects I plan to continue doing for them. Although I am disappointed in their decision to not keep me on staff, I think it will probably be the best for everyone, as it will give the affiliate the push it needs to learn to live without having access to me daily while also allowing me to get paid fairly based on my final products and not office hours.
My case working job is voluntarily coming to an end but this was inevitable because the nature of the position and the bureaucracy that surrounded it was slowly wearing me down. I will however miss the interesting and candid conversations with my co-workers about parenting, relationships, and race. Not to mention how nice it felt to be constantly thanked for my work and complimented on my efforts… if only it could have been an environmental agency!
Looking ahead to the next few days, I will be leaving my case working (sigh of relief), ending a four year process of building a green building program (sigh of disappointment/relief), moving to John’s Island, and becoming a farmer. Change, change, change… I really do love change in its entirely intense, sometimes uncomfortable, but always life sculpting nature. It will be glorious to finally embrace my love of growing things and be able to spend my days doing nothing but learning every aspect of the food production world! Just imagine me breaking out of my office cubicle with pitchfork in hand, leaving behind a trail of paperwork and “while you were out” messages, and diving into a pile of compost while screaming out my xena call in glee.